Proper in One Culture but not the Other...

What do you do in this case? As you readers probaly know, I was raised/exposed primarily to western culture, especially when it comes to manners. I only recently found out that some things I was taught (in an Emily Post sort of way) was actually considered rude in traditional Chinese culture - especially with the elderly. For example, I was told, literally just two days ago, that it was improper to address invitations sent to my grandparents as Mr. and Mrs. It HAS to go to "Grandfather" or "Grandmother." I was taught that something like this goes into an inner envelope, if I have one (and I don't). The outer envelope, the one that the post office sees, should be Mr. and/or Mrs. or Ms. What should I do? Any advice?

It's interesting that many non-Chinese multiculturalists expect people like me to know all about Chinese etiquette. I do not. In fact, most Jook Sings do not.

Setting Dates, Superstitions and All That Jazz

I don't consider myself superstitious, but for some reason, I felt that it was important that we had a "good day" for our wedding. In fact, I even asked my parents to talk to my grandmother in Hong Kong to see if she could find out what the best days were next year. There's a book, something similar to the Farmer's Almanac, which "determines" what days are good. It isn't just for weddings, but also for grand openings/launches as well.

I did some research myself, online, as well. The 2010 edition wasn't available when we contacted my grandmother, but there were numerous websites which also did the job. I actually consulted three sites, in case they were going to say something different - you never know, right? We had two dates in mind at the time, and all three of them said that one of the chosen dates was considered excellent. The other date, however, ranged from being "so-so" to downright awful. So guess which day we decided to go for?

Some people go into a lot of detail to choose dates, using not just birthdates of the bride and the groom, but also the exact hour and time zone! That's a little too much, I think.