My parents have told me that if some people are invited, we have to invite their whole family, adult children included. The adult children don't get their own invite not because we're trying to save trees, but because it's what you're "supposed to do" in Chinese culture (these people aren't considered full adults until they're officially out of the house (i.e. married...an exception MIGHT be made if said "kidult" moved to the other side of the country/continent/other part of the world because they're so far away). To send a second invite to adult children means that you're expecting another gift. They don't even think that we need to put the kidults' names on the invitation (I am ok with sending one invite per household, of course, but I am NOT ok with not including names of the kids, whether they're of age or NOT, unless I don't know the kids' names. It's as if the kids aren't "real people" if their names weren't included.) I think my parents really should have stuck with the "green" thing because they SHOULD know that I won't necessarily"get" it. Not all first generation Canadian-born kids are going to fully understand ALL old country customs. I think immigrant parents sometimes forget that. Actually, a lot of people forget that, including the media. There are some that we like, of course, but there are also ones that we don't.
Am I turning into a bridezilla already?
Cindy!
ReplyDeleteoh, that's tough! :( when is the date, by the way?
we'll have to keep each other updated in terms of our weddings; mine is 17 august.
it's funny: Jared is the very-black sheep amidst 9 siblings in a devout Utah-based Mormon family. leah is... well, leah. ;)
but we're opting for pure simplicity: come as you are, to borrow a page from the good book of Cobain.
anyway, my little AfrAsian mafia will head over to his parents' 5-acre property in payson, utah; no invitations, no registries, no dress code. it's going to be a very informal little ceremony under the gazebo in their backyard. i'm going to wear a white (!) sundress that i pulled from my closet & no shoes, then put some flowers in my afro. we're going to create playlists on our ipods of songs requested by our families/friends (actually, moreso my family, tee-hee), my only demand being i get to walk down the aisle to "White Wedding" by Billy Idol.
the after the ceremony, we're going to have a barbeque in the yard, dig in on the homemade cake J's sister is making (complete with clay skeleton bride/groom toppers that he & i are going to make), let the kids (erm, & the bride) play on the trampoline, maybe bust out some karaoke (again, moreso for my family).
then when the mormons all go to bed, the AfrAsian mafia is going to hit the pubs. (...are there pubs in Utah?? i need to look in to this.)
aaanyway, my point is that it's *your* day, sweetie (even more than it is his, he he)! roll how you do 'cuz you only get one! keep me posted, eh?
(^_^) lkn
August 17 of THIS YEAR or next year? I'm getting married August 2010 (we think August 21). It's going to be big for us, but probably small for many of our relatives (we're guessing about 125-130 people in total. I have had relatives who've had 300 people!!). Your wedding sounds like it's going to be a lot of fun! I'm in early stages of planning and so far nothing's been officially settled. Will definitely keep you (and all the other readers) posted re: everything!
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